Creative Process and Fear

I’ve always been a fan of having a creative process – my generally tends to be based on large amounts of coffee with little sleep the night before.  I’m just waiting for PayPal to go through and clear me and I’ll be paying my fees to head to Guatemala to help out for two weeks. 

I’m not going to lie and say every day I have a bit of fear about this – am I strong enough (yes)? Am I going to just break down and cry (probably)? Am I going to be emotionally scarred (Maybe a little bit)? But there is another voice that’s just as loud…and getting louder saying: “Sam, you left an abusive marriage, you went to university and discovered how strong you were, you became a runner, you said goodbye to your puppy and yes, you cried but you were there for him in his last moments.  You can do this because you’re strong enough to see that not every animal can be saved…but maybe you can make a difference for one.  This will change your life.  You will grow through the stress and the pain and the fear.  You will face poverty and you will face cultural differences…but you’ll do it.”

That’s the voice that I credit to going to university – I learned to be stronger than my doubt, criticize my inner critic for being too hard on me and rise to any challenge because success is doing everything you can do to get to a goal – not JUST accomplishing it.

So am I scared to be traveling alone to a country I know little about with absolutely no Spanish (yet) under my belt (Darn right I am).  Am I backing down because of fear? Not a chance.

Guatemala 2013, here I come. 

And on a food related note, I’m baking brownies tonight

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